The Upside Down

I’m just going to go ahead and say it.

I just don’t get this upside down Christmas tree thing. I just don’t get it! I don’t like it at all! In the words of Hattie McDaniel as Mammy in “Gone With The Wind,” “It ain't fittin'... it ain't fittin'…It jes' ain't fittin'... It ain't fittin'… Hmmph!”

I keep seeing upside down Christmas trees on tv commercials. Are they trying to make us think that folks across the world are gathering around this weirdness and singing “Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree?” I mean, you’d have to rewrite the lyrics to so many Christmas songs!

I’d feel like I was living in a movie. “The Poseidon Adventure.” I would feel like Shelly Winters was about to swim from somewhere and come up in my living room floor and yell, “Oh Manny!” And then collapse.

I just can’t even imagine hanging ornaments on this upside down tree. I’d come home, at the end of the day, and all my ornaments would be in a pile under the tree, after sliding off this…this…thing.

And what if you had a “spell?” (Refer to earlier blog) You would wake up, just trying to reorient yourself and see this upside down tree. Why you would need your bottle of ammonia all over again!

I guess if this upside down tree thing catches on, we will be singing new Christmas carols about an upside down tree.

It just ain’t fittin!

From the mind of me.